If ever you’ve felt like you didn’t understand why humans acted the way they did in certain situations toward you, perhaps it could be that they saw something in you they didn’t like or understand, but weren’t able to properly articulate. Or maybe they were just assholes. Regardless, it has been a wonderful experience to have had so many of you teach me about myself through messages about how you’ve related to what I’ve said. Connection with likeminded individuals sure beats spending all that time in an isolation chamber.

One can get exhausted when constantly vacillating between extremes. The current and overwhelming trend of fitting everything into a cute little binary birthday box with a pretty white bow on top doesn’t lend itself to any bit of grey relief. Sometimes it feels like you don’t belong anywhere, which is really discombobulating if at one point in time you felt like you belonged anywhere you god damn wanted to. If the last few years have taught me anything, it’s that as much as I thought I was aware of, concerning how much I didn’t know about things, the truth is that there is so much more I do not know than I originally postulated. Was that even a sentence? Regardless, to most of us, what we do not know is a truly unfathomable amount of shit. So I’m choosing to start over. Again. But not like reinventing myself between every grade of high school in the hopes of finding a place to belong. More like allowing myself to sit amid the chaos while listening to my body as it slowly reveals a more accurate me to itself.